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don't make this mistake...

6/28/2014

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As a long-time career and leadership coach, I can't count the number of times I've heard managers and employees describe their work colleagues as family, and tell me, "It's like a family here," or "My boss told us we're a family..."

I've done it myself. 

I've had colleagues (and a few managers) whom I felt were like family.  And in fact, there was both closeness and trust; I do have former colleagues/managers whom I regard as lifelong friends, and those friendships have stood the test of time.  I value them.

But "like family"?  Not true, and not smart.


They were first and foremost professional colleagues.  Fortunately for me, they developed over time into good friends as well.


Perhaps there are exceptions--I can believe that; but  referring to work as family can be downright dangerous to your career. 
Managers and colleagues leave, and/or retire or get laid off, and that changes everything at work.  Or you leave, or you may be laid off...by that same manager who said you were family.

Actual family-owned businesses I've seen have had some distinctly UN-"family"-like issues in the workplace. 

Considering how dysfunctional many real families are, is this a metaphor you want to continue using for your relationships at work?


Why does this matter so much?  Here is an absolutely compelling short article from HBR to say why the "family" analogy is not a good one for work and career.   Read this and give it some thought (even if, like me, you are not a fan of sports analogies, they are perfect for making the authors' points in this article).  It matters.  A lot.
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